The good people of Germany make great sex toys, that much is clear. Is the Ussy, a silicone masturbator good enough for you to buy though? Throughout this Ussy review, we put this unique toy to the test.
The Ussy was sent to us for free in return for an honest review. This page may contain affiliate links and if you use them, it helps me fund the articles I write on this website, so thanks for your support!
First Impressions of The Ussy
Score: 9.5 / 10
Reviewer: Adam RougeSkip to full score summary
The Ussy arrived in discrete and ecological packaging. The sex toy comes in an extremely wide variety of colours but we chose rouge of course. If you visit the Ussy shop they have eight colours to choose from but if you ask for a custom made Ussy, you can select any colour from the RAL colour standard. This means there are literally hundreds of colours to choose from.
The Ussy is a good looking sex toy and has a very modern design. All of the photographs I’ve seen of the Ussy, including my own, don’t really do the toy justice. It really is a nice looking object. Its minimalist design is something you will appreciate most in person.
The Ussy is made from high-quality silicone (EG 67/548EWG and DIN EN IOS 9001 certified if that means anything to you). Apart from feeling fucking great, which I’ll get to later, the pure silicone finish means that the Ussy is extremely easy to clean and is very safe because silicone isn’t toxic. Like all silicone, it attracts dust though so you’ll want to find a box, tin or satin pouch to store it in.
The inside of the toy has small bumps and ridges along the shaft, which varies in diametre. It isn’t the kind of highly intricate and complex pattern that you will find in toys made by Fleshlight or Tenga. The texture of the Ussy is like the toy itself, quite minimal. As you’ll see later though, this minimal texture is more than up to the job of inducing pleasure.
There is a small hole at the back end of the toy. Putting your finger over that will increase the suction of the toy when your penis is inside. It works really well for again, such a minimal control. You can also squeeze the sides of the Ussy and increase the pressure on your penis manually. This variable pressure is something Fleshlight can’t offer. Fleshlight’s suction controls are also not as effective as the one on the Ussy is. More on comparisons later.
The weight of the Ussy surprised me the most. In photos I had seen it looked light and perhaps a little flimsy. It is anything but flimsy. The thinnest middle section has the thinnest silicone, however the front and back of the toy are made of a soft yet solid block of silicone. That gives it a nice weight in hand.
Last quick mention about the lube required. You need water-based lube for this toy. It is supplied with some that has Horny Goats Weed extract, which I found pretty neat. Horny Goats Weed is meant to increase erection quality if you take it orally, this is the first time I’ve seen it in a lube.
Experience with The Ussy
I was excited to use the Ussy because to me it looks like a bizarre masturbator. I’ve tried many sex toys that have been designed for the same thing but never one that looked like this. My thoughts when I first saw the toy were “ok this is either going to be really good or really bad”.
The first time I used the Ussy sex toy was on my own. I put a great deal of water-based lube inside the toy and on my penis. Then I placed it over my erect penis. It immediately felt nice, though this isn’t a toy that will stimulate me entirely from its texture. I couldn’t simply move it up and down without squeezing or playing with the suction hole.
The suction is where it’s all at with the Ussy.
The suction is where it’s all at with the Ussy. At least from my point of view. This thing sucks my penis so damn good. With many toys, increasing the suction merely increases the air resistance inside the toy. But the Ussy is a masturbator made entirely from a non porous and flexible material, silicone. The material plus the minimal texture of the toy mean that the vacuum it can create is impressive.
Using the suction hole with the Ussy, my penis almost sticks inside the toy because the vacuum created by the toy is so effective. The result is that the Ussy is a very good dick sucking sex toy. First time I used it, I climaxed entirely from playing with the suction hole.
As I mentioned in the intro above, the middle of the toy is where the silicone is thinnest. By squeezing this part of the toy, you can increase the pressure on your penis further. It is a very nice way to use the toy but for me, I almost always play more with the suction aspect of the toy.
Another interesting note about the sensation of the Ussy is that the front of the toy (the bit that looks like a vagina opening) feels very good when pressed against the areas around the penis. For example, if I have the toy on my penis and I pull it towards my body, the surface area of the front of the toy feels really nice against my skin. That’s going back to how heavy and thick the silicone is there. It’s not going to make you climax of course but it’s just another nice thought with the toy’s design.
The beauty of the Ussy is that it’s really damn simple to figure out. I gave it to Eve to use on me and she needed no explanation. It’s just that obvious how this masturbator works. She likes playing with the suction hole at the top of the toy too because it turns her on to feel the toy resisting moving back off my penis. It’s a good toy to use with your partner.
What prevents it being a great partner toy is that it isn’t open ended. So while Eve can enjoy using the toy on me with her hands, she can’t perform oral sex on me at the same time and most of what is going on with my penis is hidden when the toy is on it. That’s an expected result of using a toy like this with a partner though. It isn’t necessarily a bad thing but it will bother some people more than others. Particularly if you or your partner like giving/receiving oral more.
Cleaning the Ussy
Cleaning and drying the Ussy is easy as hell. You just run some warm water through and over it and clean it with some soap or sex toy cleaner (if you have it). The silicone and minimal texture means that the Ussy will dry fairly quickly if you leave it out in the open. You still have to position it at an appropriate angle for any runaway water to leave it though. It’s also important to let it dry completely before putting it away. Just because it’s silicone doesn’t mean you can worry less about drying it.
The Ussy is 100 times easier to clean that a Fleshlight. It is also easier than cleaning a Tenga. You need no renewing powder for an Ussy either, so it really is easier in comparison to many others.
As mentioned before, silicone attracts dust. Especially soft silicone. Therefore you should keep the Ussy away from dust. Unfortunately it doesn’t come with its own storage pouch so you should buy one for it or use a box etc to store it.
Conclusion of the Ussy
To be honest I expected the Ussy to feel good but I didn’t expect it to blow my mind. In the end, I was particularly impressed by its suction power, meaning it surprised me in a positive way. In my opinion, the suction power makes it an exceptional penis sex toy. For that reason alone I recommend it to you and can say it merits the designer price tag. The bonus is of course that it looks like a designer object too.
So is the Ussy better than the two big kids on the block, Fleshlight and Tenga? It’s definitely different but it is better at some things. It depends on what you want from a toy like this. The textures inside many Fleshlights and Tenga toys are more detailed and sensory than the minimal texture in the Ussy. So for texture, the other two are better. The other two brands also have a wider range of choices in size, texture and other features. HOWEVER… I haven’t yet used a Fleshlight or Tenga toy with as good suction as I get in the Ussy. For suction and aesthetic design, the Ussy wins.
Neither Fleshlight nor Tenga are as long-lasting either because of their materials, which naturally degrade over time. With the pure silicone Ussy, you won’t need to replace it like you will the other two (providing you look after it properly). The Ussy just looks better too, at least in my opinion. I like to think of it this way… the Ussy is a designer object as well as a sex toy. Other simple masturbators don’t quite fit that description. The Arcwave Ion looks designer too, however it’s a completely different kind of penis toy.
Anyway… where does the Ussy fall down? In my opinion, it’s only in the partner sex department. If you and your partner like using oral sex a lot, the Ussy may not be as good for you. You’d be better off with something more open-ended. Yet if you enjoy using hand toys together then you’ll feel the Ussy is a perfect fit for your games together. If your partner doesn’t actually like giving oral to you, then the Ussy will be an even better toy for you, because it will give you that impression of being sucked.
And yes, for your info the Ussy will attach to the Handy if you own it.
Thank you very much to The Ussy for sending me this toy to test! I’ll leave you dear reader, with this advert for the Ussy, which is done in the style of a musical. This video might not turn you on but it’s fucking funny.