Trying to get one’s first prostate orgasm can feel a little like searching for the Holy Grail. Prostate massage and P Spot masturbation is widely misunderstood in my opinion. A lot of hype surrounds it and there is a lot of marketing that makes it seem like getting a P spot orgasm should be easy. It wasn’t easy for most people, including me.
My patience paid off and I’d like to offer you some guidance on what to expect from your first P Spot orgasm.
Only time and practice will get you a P Spot orgasm
No toy can guarantee a prostate orgasm. Some make it easier and I’ve rated a lot of toys that help me the most. You still need a lot of practice before you’ll achieve prostate orgasm though, even with the best toy. You still need to be in the right mindset and know what to expect.
Prostate massage requires a different mindset to penis masturbation. It’s a different kind of masturbation and sex, not just physically but mentally too. It often requires far more time than penis masturbation does. The penis is ideally not stimulated directly at all during prostate massage.
The temptation to touch the penis during prostate massage can be big. Both if you’re a solo person masturbating or you’re a partner doing it to someone else. Some subtle stimulation to the penis is fine but it should not be masturbated if you want achieve full prostate orgasm.
What a full prostate orgasm feels like to me
Usually, I begin my prostate massage sessions with a lot of lube and a good toy. If I have a manual toy, I need to use the muscles in my butt more to move it around and contract repeatedly around the toy. If there is a toy moving inside me or I have a very strong vibrator, I don’t have to move the toy around myself as much. This is also the case if my girlfriend performs prostate massage on me with her fingers (because she presses my prostate without me needing to do anything).
The initial stage of prostate massage / masturbation will feel boring to most beginners. Particularly if these beginners are used to frantic penis masturbation with a quick build up. Such people might be expecting to edge for the entire prostate massage, which won’t be the case. It’s a slow process, a little like a real massage. It requires patience.
This post is mostly about what prostate orgasm feels like and what to expect. If you’re looking for more of a guide, I wrote one here.
20 – 40 minutes into prostate masturbation
Before I start to feel like I’m building towards an orgasm, 20 to 40 minutes might have passed. It depends on how relaxed I am, how turned on I am and how good the prostate stimulation is. When I first began trying to achieve prostate orgasm I’d usually just give up in frustration after 30 minutes. Now I know I just need to keep going and stay relaxed, resisting any urge to touch my penis, which will usually have gone soft from lack of direct stimulation. It’s normal for the penis to become flaccid during prostate milking and you shouldn’t worry about it.
When I can finally feel my orgasm building up, it might be 10 minutes or more before I actually get there.
30 – 50 minutes into prostate masturbation (the build up)
During my build up to orgasm phase (lasting around 10 minutes), I don’t get orgasms but I have a very intense feeling around the area of the prostate. It’s like a big bubble of bliss that’s slowly inflating and getting ready to burst. The location of the sensation isn’t exactly in my butt, it’s more halfway between my anal canal and my penis. The build up of sensation isn’t in the penis at all though, this build up is in a different location to usual (the prostate). The sensation I get as I build up the orgasm is quite sharp and very noticeable. It isn’t subtle at all unless I stop pressing repeatedly on the prostate.
Sometimes my penis becomes hard again during this 10 minute or so pre-orgasm phase and sometimes it doesn’t. It will usually have been soft for some time while I built up to prostate orgasm.
The P Spot Orgasm
When I begin to orgasm, my penis usually gets hard all of a sudden and I ejaculate. It’s usually not until mid ejaculation that the full sensation of prostate orgasm finally hits me. This is different to penis orgasms, where I usually feel the wave of pleasure right from the start of ejaculation (or even before).
Prostate orgasms for me feel like massive explosions of electrical energy. The main sensation explodes in my groin area and then the electric jolts up my spine, around my body and then back down my front, towards my genitals. It’s a whole body experience and I feel electric everywhere. That boom of energy can be quick and intense or slightly slower and more pulsing in nature (like rapid waves of energy). I wouldn’t go as far as to say I see stars etc but usually prostate orgasms feel far more intense than penis orgasms do. I’m usually way more vocal during a prostate orgasm than a penis orgasm because I’m less in control of myself.
Multiple prostate orgasms
The main reason multiple orgasms are possible with prostate play is that the buzz chemicals of sex don’t wear off afterwards (as they do with penis orgasms). For some reason, my sexual energy never diminishes after prostate play. After classic masturbation, the penis is often left exhausted and occasionally over sensitive too. With prostate play, the penis isn’t really involved that much, so it doesn’t feel exhausted.
With prostate play, I usually go for at least two orgasms. That can take me an hour. The only reason I ever stop my prostate masturbation sessions is because I don’t have any time left to continue. After having two climaxes I don’t feel like waiting anymore either, so if the next orgasm takes too long to build up, I stop.
What does the penis feel like during and after prostate orgasms?
If prostate play is going well, it is rarely possible for me to switch back to penis play. After I’ve already reached the prostate build-up phase, I can masturbate my penis and it’s a nice additional layer of sensation. Yet even if I touch my penis while I’m building up to a prostate climax, my body and mind are focussed almost entirely on my prostate. My penis can’t take over at that point so it’s totally possible that even if I try masturbating, I’ll stay soft. Remember, this is a different kind of masturbation to penis play.
When I have a full prostate orgasm, it’s strange because I ejaculate without the usual huge build up of sensation in my penis head and shaft. As I already mentioned, the shock of the orgasm usually hits me after I started ejaculating rather than before. The ripple of orgasmic energy I get from the prostate orgasm makes my penis throb with sensation. It feels great and that’s why my penis gets hard during a prostate orgasm. The sensation is slightly different though because there is less compression and direct tissue stimulation to the penis. I get the inner sensation of penis orgasm without feeling the physical contact.
Switching back to masturbating the penis after prostate orgasm
I usually can’t switch straight back to sex after prostate play because my body is too focused on stimulation of the prostate. It’s important for any partner to realise this if they perform prostate play on someone. The one getting the prostate massage might be soft while the other masturbates them and might need transition time after prostate orgasm to go back to penis sex. In my opinion it’s better to do prostate massage as a separate activity, to keep it apart from normal sex. For couples who are into pegging, that will be their sex.
How long will it take to achieve prostate orgasm and why go to so much effort?
Everybody who wants to try prostate play needs to understand that it requires A LOT of patience and time. Prostate massage can last 40 minutes to an hour before the first orgasm arrives. After the first orgasm, it might still be a long time before the second arrives (even when continuing to stimulate the prostate).
I had many failed attempts before I finally started getting prostate orgasms. It took me just over a year of practice. It doesn’t necessarily make it easier to achieve prostate orgasm after you get your first, however after you do get your first, you’ll have more of an incentive to wait for future p spot orgasms. I’ve gotten faster with time, yet if I’m feeling impatient or frenzied then I sometimes don’t succeed.
What prostate orgasm has meant for me is that I don’t have to masturbate in the same way all the time. The reason it is called prostate massage is because it really is possible to look at it like a massage you do to yourself or receive from someone else. Prostate play has given me the ability to lay back for an hour and enjoy an amazing self massage. The prostate orgasm is just the cherry on the cake. Like a lot of things, it’s the journey that makes the destination count.
What the after effects of prostate orgasm feel like
One last thing, it’s normal for the prostate and inside the anus to feel sensitive for up to a day afterwards. Depending on the size of the toy I used, I might need a good few days before doing more prostate masturbation.
If you feel bruised, it’s because you used too big a toy or you were playing with the one you have too enthusiastically. You’ll need to wait a few days in such cases before doing more prostate play and possibly adjust the intensity you’re using or the size of the toy you have.
I hope you enjoyed this post on what prostate orgasms feel like and I sincerely hope that it inspires you to practice and get your first P Spot orgasm! If you need more guidance on toys and specific techniques I use, I have a very complete guide to prostate massage that you can read for free here.
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