Review: Charlie Horse Milk It and Kidney by Square Peg Toys

Alright folks, it’s time to take prostate play to the next level with these big toys by Square Peg. In this article I review both the Charlie Horse Kidney and the Charlie Horse Milk It. One of them is with Square Peg’s soft silicone and the other is with their harder silicone. Let’s jump in… or on rather.

First off I’d like to say a big thanks to Peepshow Toys for sending me these two prostate plugs. Peepshow is one of the few shops that sell only body-safe toys. They sent me these Square Peg Toys for free in return for an honest review. This page contains affiliate links. If you use them, that helps me out a lot. Thanks to everyone who supports this blog by using them!

First Impressions of the Charlie Horses by Square Peg Toys

“Damn… what have I gotten myself into here?”

This was the first thing I thought on unwrapping the Charlie Horse Kidney and Milk’it by Square Peg Toys. These prostate plugs are really big compared to the others I’ve tested. I knew they would be large but that first look into the box was… impressive.

I chose to have the Charlie Kidney Horse in the softer bronze silicone and the Charlie Milk It in the firmer black silicone that Square Peg does. I asked for both mostly out of curiosity but also because I thought it would be good for you to have a direct comparison between the two firmnesses.

Now let’s get back to that size… I have to be honest, I was a little worried when I first picked up both of these toys. Both their diameters are 2 inches through at the widest point. For an anal toy, that’s pretty big. In the end I found them very pleasurable to use but just know that you HAVE to be an advanced user for these. You need to have some experience with larger toys because if you go straight from something tiny to this, you’re going to be asking for trouble. So with that in mind, I am assuming in this review that you are an advanced user if you continue reading.

Dimensions of the Charlie Horse Prostate Toys

As I mentioned, these toys are big. Both are similar sizes but here are the exact measurements of each. The Charlie Horse Kidney is the slightly smaller one of the two but honestly that’s difficult to tell in tests I did with them. What makes more of a difference is the firmness of silicone, which I’ll get to after these measurements.

To remind you, the circumference of a toy is the measurement all the way around it and the diameter is the length from one side straight through to the other side.

Charlie Horse Milk’It measurements

Charlie Horse Kidney measurements

The soft firmness of Square Peg Toys

Below is a picture of the maximum I can bend Square Peg Toy’s softest silicone Charlie Horse with one hand (a lot)!

The firmer black Square Peg Toys silicone

With Square Peg Toy’s firmest silicone, the below image shows about the maximum I can bend it with one hand. It still bends a lot but not as much as the softer bronze silicone I showed above.

Storing the Charlie Horse Milk’it and Kidney

Just a quick word about storage before I move on to my experiences with the toys. Above is an image of the packaging that the Charlie Horse Kidney and Milk’it arrive in. Square Peg Toys seems to use very minimal packaging but honestly it’s for the best. We’re polluting the damn planet too much after all. The really cool thing about the packaging is that it is also the protective case that you will store the toys inside of when they’re not in use. Those plastic pouches are thick and have clippy things at the top so are resealable. Very good idea!

See Square Peg Toys at Peep Show

Experience with the Charlie Horse Kidney and Milk It

I’m lucky enough to review both the Charlie Horse Kidney and Milk’it, with both levels of firmness. Initially the decision to take both was because I knew that would be interesting to tell you about. Holy crap am I glad I have both though. If you can afford it, I’d recommend doing the same. Here’s why…

Inserting the Charlie Horse Kidney (soft silicone version)

The softer Charlie Horse Kidney I have is ALWAYS the Charlie Horse that I start with. As I mentioned in the opening of this article, these prostate toys are big even for me, so I appreciate that extra compression that the soft silicone allows for. Before I use the Charlie Horse Kidney, I also always use a smaller prostate toy to warm up first. My go-to is the Progasm Ice by Aneros. That Aneros one is a medium sized, so very comfortable for me to insert and keep in for 30 minutes while I warm up for the bigger Charlie Horse toys. I’d strongly recommend you get a smaller toy like the Progasm or a small plug to warm up before you use the Charlie Horses.

Anyway, after warming up with a smaller toy I apply A LOT of lube to the soft silicone Charlie Horse Kidney. Also a lot of lube to myself. Seriously I can’t stress that enough… lots of lube. I usually apply it two or three times to the Charlie Horse Kidney before I insert it all the way. When I insert it, I sit down on it slowly until it’s all the way in. For the majority of the toy, it’s actually fairly easy and comfortable for me to insert. It’s that big bulb near the bottom of the toy that requires careful consideration. I won’t lie, that bulb is still a little too much for me to just slam it in. Right now for example, I wouldn’t personally be able to use the Charlie Horse like I would a dildo because taking it in and out too many times would probably hurt me.

When the Charlie Horse is inside me though… WOW… it feels so good and so comfortable! Seriously, I could keep this thing in for a few hours if I wanted to. Considering how carefully I had to insert it, I was very surprised by how comfortable it was when in.

Having an orgasm with the Charlie Horse Kidney inside me

The next thing I guess you want to know dear reader, is how well does the Charlie Horse Kidney stimulate me? How good is the orgasm? Well it’s a bit mixed for me with this plug.

The Charlie Horse Kidney I have is with softer silicone. This softer silicone doesn’t stimulate me as directly because it bends a lot and compresses. It definitely does put pressure on my prostate and does feel really good while it’s in me, however I can’t say that it would stimulate me enough to give me a hands free P spot orgasm. At least for me, I didn’t achieve that with the Charlie Horse Kidney (soft version) yet.

Now that being said, the Charlie Horse Kidney is a GREAT toy to wear while masturbating the penis. Seriously, I love this thing. Because the whole plug is so soft, sitting down with it feels just as comfortable as lying down or standing. That’s rare with prostate massagers and plugs. Usually the firm plastic and silicone ones dig into you a little when you sit down with them. With the Charlie Horse Kidney (and the Milk It), sitting down with them inside you is actually very pleasurable.

Back to the masturbation bit I was talking of. While the Charlie Horse Kidney didn’t give me any full hands free orgasms, it did give me some very intense partial prostate orgasms. I define partial prostate orgasms as those that I have while masturbating my penis at the same time. With the Charlie Horse Kidney in, building up towards my final climax is immense. The soft silicone isn’t intense enough to give me a prostate orgasm on its own but fucking hell… its sheer size means that when my muscles tense during climax, my prostate gets squeezed and oh my god, that feels fucking awesome.

So there you have it. After my test and review of the Charlie Horse Kidney I fully recommend it. Let’s move on to the next Charlie Horse. I will come back to talk more about the Kidney in the conclusion to this article.

See latest price of Charlie Horse Kidney

Inserting the Charlie Horse Milk It (firm black silicone version)

As I already mentioned above, I never ever go straight for this firmer black silicone version of the Charlie Horse Milk’it. I always warm up first with the Aneros Progasm and second with the Charlie Horse Kidney (the soft silicone version). I could potentially go straight from a smaller warm up toy to the Charlie Horse Milk It but so far, I haven’t been brave enough for that.

This firmer version of the Charlie Horse Milk It is for sure a little more challenging to insert than the softer Charlie Horse Kidney I have. When inserting the Charlie Horse Milk It, I have to go very, very slowly. Again I use a hell of a lot of lube on this prostate toy. So much lube that even with two towels on my seat, the lube still makes it through both of them! Dear reader, if you use these toys… this is how much lube you too need to use. I’m using a water-based lube by S Liquid, which is on the thinner side. If you use a thicker silicone or oil lube then you might get away with using less. There is debate over whether silicone lube is suitable for silicone toys but Square Peg says it’s ok to use their toys with silicone lube, so if that’s what you want to do then go for it.

Back to the masturbation. The Charlie Horse Milk’it is similar to the Charlie Horse Kidney in that as you arrive near the bottom of the toy, that big bulb is the challenging bit to get inside. Another thing that makes the Charlie Horse Milk a little more challenging to insert are those waves and ridges that descend down the toy. To very experienced anal toy users, those ridges will feel utterly blissful but to less experienced folks, the same bumps will require careful manoeuvring. The reason is that with bumpy toys like this, your sphincter snaps shut and has to open again for every ridge it passes. That makes the Charlie Horse Milk It a more advanced toy than the Charlie Horse Kidney.

Orgasms with the Charlie Horse Milk It (firm silicone)

I’ve been talking a lot about how careful you need to be while inserting the Charlie Horse Milk It and how much lube is required. Rest assured though, when it is in it feels so damn good. Like the Charlie Horse Kidney (soft version), the Charlie Horse Milk’it in the firmer silicone is very comfortable when it’s inside me. It isn’t quite as comfortable as the softer silicone version I was describing above but it’s still comfortable enough for me to have worn it for up to an hour.

While the firmer Charlie Horse Milk It is lacking some of the ‘give’ and flexibility of the softer toy I mentioned above, it also means that the Charlie Horse Milk It stimulates the prostate far more directly. The firmer silicone is still quite soft when I compare it to a very rigid toy but the firmer Square Peg silicone is hard enough to rock my prostate.

Like with the Charlie Horse Kidney, this Milk it version is too big for me to use it as a thrusting toy, therefore I have to use my anal muscles to move the toy back and forth over my prostate. Those ridges feel amazing inside me. The firm silicone pressing on my prostate is also enough to give me a full P spot orgasm. It took some time… maybe close to 40 mins but holy shit did this give me some good P spot orgasms. As I approached orgasm I started dribbling cum and before long I was super hard and approaching the second orgasm.. then the third. Wow. I didn’t go any further than three orgasms because you know… I have stuff to do and had already been playing for over an hour. But yeah.. the Charlie Horse Milk It is an impressive toy.

If you are an advanced anal toy user, I fully recommend you go for the firmer black silicone version of the Charlie Horse Milk’it, it was quite fun to review. If you’re not sure if you’re ready for that level of intensity when inserting a toy like this, you’d be better off getting the Charlie Horse Milk’It in the softer silicone that I have in my Charlie Horse Kidney. You’ll still find the Milk It pleasurable with the softer silicone but it won’t stimulate you quite as directly and will possibly mean you don’t get the full prostate orgasm. Though like I always say, no toy will ever guarantee you a full prostate orgasm anyway. That takes time, patience and practice.

See latest price for Charlie Horse Milk’it

Are the Square Peg Charlie Horses too big?

If you have to ask yourself whether the Charlie Horse Milk It and Kidney are too big, then they probably are. I can only just about handle inserting these two toys and definitely wouldn’t have been able to insert anything bigger. I’m somewhat of an advanced user of prostate toys but not on this scale. For these toys, you’re going to need to have had some experience with large or at least medium sized toys already. Reviewing the Charlie Horse Milk It and Kidney was a lot of fun but they’re not the easiest toys I’ve tested!

In my opinion, the Charlie Horses could be slightly slimmer at the bottom. Those bulbs are a little bigger than necessary in my view. While I love the sensation I get from rocking the Charlie Horse Milk It on my prostate, I would enjoy using it far more if it didn’t require so much preparation before inserting it.

How easy is it to clean the Charlie Horse Kidney and Milk It?

Cleaning is an important step of any toy and not enough emphasis can be placed on this… if your toys are difficult to clean, you’re not going to want to use them as much. The Charlie Horses are luckily 100% silicone and so are fairly easy to clean.

To be honest, the softer silicone version of the toy is slightly more difficult to clean than the firm version. Not to get rid of lube, dirt etc.. it’s just that the softer silicone version clings onto odour a little more than the firmer version does. Neither of the toys has a big problem with odour but I do admittedly find myself washing them several times in a row in order to make sure that they’re completely clean and free of odour. So long as you clean them immediately after use, everything is fine.

You should use warm water and soap to wash them. I use Dove soap a lot and that’s fine for all of the toys I own. With the Charlie Horses I also used a scented soap too just to leave them smelling like flowers… I like my toys smelling good.

Video demo of silicone firmness difference

Conclusion: Firm, Soft, Kidney or Milk It?

The Charlie Horse Kidney and Milk It will be perfect toys for you if you are an advanced anal toy user. For me they aren’t totally perfect purely because they are bigger than I’m used to. I really enjoy them when they’re inside and I’d love to use them all the time, however the reality is that I probably won’t use them a lot because inserting them takes more preparation than I usually have when I want to masturbate.

Charlie Horse Kidney vs Charlie Horse Milk’it… which won?

I’m going to rate these two toys separately but overall, both combined get a 9/10! I am rating the Charlie Horse Kidney slightly higher than the Milk It purely because it is more comfortable to wear. Don’t let these scores influence your own choice too much. What really matters in this whole article and the individual things I say about each toy. If you’re going to get one, you need to consider the things I say about each version and then make your own informed choice, because everybody is different. If you want to reach out to me to ask anything about them, feel free to leave a comment below or shoot me a mail via my contact form.

Best choice for more intense prostate play

If you want more intense and direct stimulation to your prostate then you should go for the Charlie Horse Milk It with the firm silicone. That will give you the most stimulation. The first reason is simply that the extra ridges on the Charlie Horse Milk It will add extra sensation both on insertion and while it’s inside you. The reason you should get the firmer silicone version is because that will allow you to press it more firmly onto your prostate while you play with it.

If you are a beginner or an intermediate user though, it is NOT a good idea to get the Charlie Horse Milk It in the firmer version. Beginners need to stay away from this toy, however intermediate users might prefer the softer version of the Charlie Horse Milk It. The softer version of the toy will feel more comfortable and has the potential to be slightly easier to insert.

Best choice for more long-term wear and anal training

For those of you that want a prostate style butt plug that you can wear for a long time, I strongly recommend the soft version of the Charlie Horse Kidney. Despite its size, it is very easy for me to forget that I have it in, that’s how comfortable I find it when it’s inside me. The size of the Charlie Horse Kidney even in the soft version will be a great toy to use if you need to train yourself for anal sex or for other bigger toys. The advantage of the Charlie Horse Kidney is that because it is totally smooth and doesn’t have ridges, it is in my opinion more comfortable to wear for a long time than the Charlie Horse Milk It.

If you want a long term plug that will give a little extra stimulation or will be fun to play with when thrusting, the Charlie Horse Milk It in the softer version could also be an interesting version of the toy for you. The softer version of the Charlie Horse Milk’it will be comfortable enough to wear for at least a few of hours in my opinion. The ridges won’t feel quite as intense on the soft version either, so that makes it the wiser choice if your goal is to wear the toy for several hours.

Which version of the toy I am most likely to use again

It may surprise you but I am most likely to reuse the softer Charlie Horse Kidney in the future. The reason is that while the Charlie Horse Milk’it can give me pretty intense and repeated prostate orgasms, I have a lot of smaller prostate toys that can also give me similar orgasms. What I haven’t had until now, is a prostate toy that I can wear for long periods whilst sitting down. That toy for me is now the Charlie Horse Kidney. Sure it’s still a little challenging to insert but for me this is a unique toy. I don’t own any others like it and I really appreciate its function. So yeah… Charlie Horse Kidney in the softer version is the winner for this reviewer!

What can Square Peg Toys do to make the Charlie Horses better?

This comment isn’t specific to the Charlie Horses but I think Square Peg Toys could reconsider the colouring of their firm silicone. Black is an overused colour for sex toys and personally, I don’t like the way black shows up dust. The Bronze Charlie Horse Kidney looks awesome and I bet the grey toys do as well. The firm black version… it doesn’t look bad but it’d look better in a different colour.

Obviously this next thing is my personal preference and Square Peg Toys is a brand that specialises in in larger, more advanced anal toys. However in my opinion the Charlie Horses would be better if that bulb at the bottom of them was slightly narrower. That would make them easier to insert and mean that people like me could use them on a more frequent basis. Right now the toys need a fair amount of preparation.

The Charlie Horse Mega Milk’it: For even more intensity

I only reviewed the Charlie Horse Kidney and Charlie Horse Milk’it. Square Peg toys has yet another version of this toy and that one is even more intense than the Milk’it one that I tried. The Charlie Horse Mega Milk’it is bigger than the regular Milk’it and has even more waves, indentations and curvature. If you want to truly smash your prostate, get that one. Peep Show Toys also sells that one in the soft and firm silicone. Be warned that the diameter of the Charlie Horse Mega Milk’it is even greater at a considerable 2.3 inches (5.84 cm). Just for comparison, the largest of those I tried was 2.07 inches (5.25 cm). It doesn’t sound like a lot but again, be careful with those sizes and make sure you can handle them.

Check out the Mega Milk’it

Wrapping it up and where to buy!

Again, a big thanks to Peepshow Toys for sending me the Charlie Horse Milk It and Charlie Horse Kidney to review! Peepshow sells a lot of Square Peg toys and like them are based in the USA. If you want one of the Charlie Horses, Peepshow is a great place for you to buy it!

Charlie Horse Kidney (soft version) Score

A quick note about the prices below. These were the prices when I wrote this article. They could be different by the time you read this 😉

Charlie Horse Milk It (firm version) Score

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